Dying hope

Memories of a past gone by
Memories to cherish and say goodbye
Memories that flood your eyes
Everytime you realise
That its not everyday
Time grants you an elusive stay
In the capsule of emotions.

In times of despair
do we ever care
about the other side of life
in which obstacles are rife
when the compass of direction
falters with no compassion
to be relegated...in an antique collection.

Defiant for we are forever
to destinies lone messenger
which for me now has become
along with the rising sun
my trusty newspaper.

In trepidation and desperation
I turn the pages in isolation
Is there some news for me?
What does my festering premonition let me see?
Alas!...it's the same old rhetoric
A new law to hoodwink the optimistic.

A law comes
and a law goes
but does it make any difference
to those who struggle
with those whose minds are fickle?
Time it seems
will always have an answer.

NRPNG - Non Resident Persona Non Grata

What is it with Indians?

Specifically NRIs?

They quickly embrace foreign culture. So soon that Siddharth morphs into 'Sid' overnight. Danny dude has completely forgotten that he was a 'Dhanish' back home. In Rang De Basanti, DJ and his cronies accept history lessons from a Brit chick in between ogling women on FTV and taking swigs of beer. Everyone loved the movie but failed to see the irony of it all. Indian history taught by a Brit. The directors are right, we aren't passionate about our own history. Even in film history too,Satyajit Rays entire collection is neatly catalogued in an temperature controlled vault in Beverly Hills.

I have come across many such people. Two relatives of mine and many on the Internet. Yet they wear masks to blend in with the rest of the crowd. Because if they aired their true 'grievances' publicly, they'd be squashed both literally and figuratively. All they'd have left to say would be - "Peace - yo!".

I've read the blog of an MBA dude who calls Gandhi a half naked beggar, who divided a nation. A 'cruel' person who never cared for his kids. The great Bahraini blogger went on to pick many personalities of Indian origin. I bet he has Dick Cheney's poster right next to some FHM hottie. How I wish he went quail hunting with Cheney.

I've read a Keralite girls blog about the 'smelly' people she gladly left for good. Never mind that she relishes the fantastic fish they sold to her for dirt cheap. Never mind that she nostalgically yearns for that mango pickle which the smelly people pickled for her. Never mind that she finds most Indians uncouth. When I commented that she insulted herself quite beautifully, completely forgetting that she would always remain an Indian, the whole posse of Mensa certified bloggers crucified me. I was the one who had the last laugh.

And today, I come across the 'stereotyped' Indian cum Arab. Torn between two majestic cultures, X loves to snipe from across the sand dunes in full combat uniform. Only that the bullet always loses its mark. And X doesn't know that comouflage is virtually useless in a barren land save for the odd cacti and the friendly camels. But X wears the uniform well, for X believes that you have to dress well to act the part. So does the Bangladeshi who walks around in his unwashed kandoora in his '99 Lexus, believing that he's The Complete Emirati.

Lots of luck to X and the Bangladeshi. You are both on a ship in the sea of stupidity. Keep steering cap-tin, you never know when you'd strike gold.

I've been reading blogs since 2002, when the blog explosion began. Hundreds of blogs visited, from across the world. But I'm yet to come across anybody disowning their own country for flimsy reasons. Americans hate America for being led under Bush Jr., and Indians.....for being Indian.

I wonder why that Indian director met Paris Hilton to play the role of Mother Teresa. Pamela Anderson is clearly the most desired of the lot.



Pam says hi to Miss X. Bangladeshi....you there? Dammit you rolled up your tints ....AGAIN?

Do you....

love to blow your own trumpet?

A question of simple economics

I don't know what's going through the minds of voters here:



It seems many are very hopeful. Hopeful of a faster service. Hopeful of sleeker service. Hopeful of finally having a mini bullet train to enjoy a boring ride, should you care to peer out the window.

But where's the hope of it being economical? Presently a bus ticket from Dubai to Sharjah costs 5 Dhs. For a daily to and fro commute, thats 10Dhs. To pay the equivalent of 1.5 gallons of petrol is not right. It still isn't economical, and is still not popular. Getting a Chevy Spark / Daihatsu Sirion will still turn out cheaper, and still leave you with plenty of fuel to go places other than your office. What can beat a car at 399 Dhs. per month? Practically nothing. Get a friend of yours from the office to join you, and it's even more economical.

Lets see, suppose a person were to travel via the Metro circa 2009. In accordance with inflation rates, a ride will cost him 7 Dhs. Thats 14 dhs and it still doesnt cover the damages of reaching the train station and exiting it back to his home. It'll cost approx 5 dhs, excluding taxi charges to and from the train station for Dubai residents. Holy cow.

If a simple study was undertaken prior to designing the Metro, it would have been very clear why Dubais roads are clogged 24/7:

1. Economics: Buses are still costly. Taxis are twice as costly as those found in the capital. Result - a ritual in progress from many years. Get residence visa - get drivers licence - buy car.

2. Anachronistic work schedules: Many companies still have the 1-4pm break. And there are people who still want to go home to have lunch and take a nap. Where else in the world do we have such timings?

3. No car pooling: A heavy penalty levied should you feel 'human'. That is, help out your friends by dropping them. Expect a local CID to materialise at the wrong place at the rong time on the wrong day, in accordance with Murphy's law.

Being Freaking Cyrus

After watching DJ and team radio-guide a country by assasinating the defence minister in Rang De Basanti, I thought this indie-looking film would provide some entertainment.

This is the story of a dysfuctional Parsi family. One fine morning, the protagonist Mr.Cyrus walks into their lives, quite literally. Cyrus (Saif Ali khan) is a young man in his twenties and has no worthwhile aim in life. Other than pottery and lusting at 50 year old women and their assets, that is. The narrative is given by Cyrus himself reminiscent of The Wonder Years. Other cast include Naseerudin Shah, Dimple Kapadia and Boman Irani. So far so good.

Cyrus is back it seems, to exact revenge. Or maybe something which he feels like revenge in his twisted little head. However, with no tangible story, how can the characters pull everything together? Just like 80% of all hindi movies, half time through - the oft repeated and irritating question springs up in mind - Where the hell is this film headed to ? We see Dimple Kapadia trying to seduce a guy old enough to be her son. We see her adjusting her blouse so that he falls for her. Cyrus is portrayed as the special breed of freaks who'd get it on with anyone - age no bar. Kapadias cleavage is unintentionally shown in a sequence, and that too with the camera placed all to strategically. I absolutely hate it when actresses of her age are forced to do what their daughters are good at.

Naseerudin shah is totally wasted. He's mainly cast to look like a Parsi, not act like one. For an actor of his calibre, he shouldn't have demeaned himself. Kapadia hams throughout the movie. Every scene makes us wince, I think it's the language. Needlessly twisting and contorting her face, she's just not comfortable in English skin. Boman Irani stands out, he's one actor I always look forward to.

This is supposed to be a black comedy. Only that the dialogues are cliched, and every actor (save for Saif and Boman) are made to ham.

Yet another hyped movie, just because it's all in english. And thats where the problem is, we're yet to perfect the subtle nuances in the comic gestures which are best performed in hindi. Certain jokes remain best localised and this movie is chock full of it.

Sort of like Jay Leno nailing a punch line in Hindi. Frightening!!!

Mathematicians Rejoice!!!

GN Exclusive!!
Bangkok, The city of Angles.

Tightening the noose

5% housing fee.


20% raise in school fee.


10% raise in essential items.


All in all, April was fantastic in itself. 35% within 17 days. Say half of it affects us, after a 'correction factor' is thrown in. 17%, and there's nothing to offset even 1% of this.


Letters/opinions/recommendations from 80% of the 3.5 million strong expat community have not made any effect. The rest of the 20% of the affluent expat community have a particular strain of thought, the strain that they feel will bind them together as one. They have no questions. Questions arise only when that roof breaks during a mild shower. Then it's back to normal.


I forsee empty fridays, empty malls, empty airports within 24 months. Unless someone forsees that Dubai is becoming one giant hotel.


The lyrics of 'Hotel California' is good food for thought.

Last thing I remember, I was
Running for the door
I had to find the passage back
To the place I was before
'Relax,' said the night man,
'We are programmed to receive.
You can check-out any time you like,
But you can never leave!

The Theory of Lost

I'm a huge fan of Lost, the other day I came across a link, titled the 'ultimate
theory', which is in effect - the real story behind the island.

In a special episode, the cast told us that we must look into the background (literally) for certain unexplained events as the episodes progress, say like Walts ability to think beyond, win every game, Locke never having to use the wheelchair again, etc.

This guy must have access to JJ Abrams million dollar script.

Do not venture into this link, if you don't want to be startled, it's beyond the wildest theories ever thought of - but eerily, it really makes every chip fall into place. And those pesky numbers, aside from the fact that it's some kind of progression...it's

4 + 8 + 15 + 16 + 23 + 42 = 108 minutes, the time it takes for a particular satellite to orbit the earth.

The numbers are the only ones which haven't been theorised yet, especially the significance of the number 23.

Back to THE link, you've been WARNED!
The Ultimate Lost Theory>>
http://www.4815162342.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=7712

The lonely world we live in

This article shocked the living daylights out of me.

She was 40 years old, and not one of her brother or sisters even bothered to find out where she was when she went missing for 2 years. They could've contacted the Metropolitan Housing Trust to find out where she was. They never even filed a 'missing' report. It seems she had bought Christmas presents for someone near to her, someone who'd known where she lived. But to discard a person in this manner, is even worse than jailing an innocent person.

40 years and living in solitude. Despite the advances in technology - mainly the ubiquitous cell phone, GPS, motion sensors, webcams, and may more obscure techologies in the offing, the fact remains that humans are the worst threat to humans. Forget globalisation, forget communism, forget Bush Jr.'s war(s), we have become adept at ignoring and hating people to such an extent that was never possible. Will we ever have kids who will remain kids? Kids who don't ask adults whether that guy is gay for wearing a pink tie? People who value life from an emotional standpoint rather than a purely physical one? Or has it boiled down to a matter of economics, which thwarts compassion in the face, as compassion cannot be valued? Does everything have to be valued in order to be appreciated?

Or is it because we have become smarter, we cannot indulge in the simple pleasures of life? We drive ourselves to exclusive resorts and exclusive tickets and exclusive showpieces, because we have to live THE life, kingsize maybe? Because credit cards make it easier to pile debt upon debt so that we can afford something we couldn't afford in the first place? Ironic as it may seem, we don't give a damn about anyone, yet subconsciously wish everyone thought the opposite about us?

We have lost our morals, we have lost our bearings. We're trying to keep up with a world thats turning faster than we do, Einsteins theory of relativity notwithstanding.
As Linkin Park's "Points of Authority" goes...
"You can't win the race! The pace is too fast! You just won't last!"
Yes, you'll never last. And even if you do, taking all the time in the world.... surprise, surprise, deaths right behind you.

Dirty Rotten Scoundrel(s)

I personally feel that the verdict handed to Salman is very harsh. This is because it is his first crime. He does not have a track record and he is not a hard core criminal.

Source:here

VS.

Apart from the hit-and-run case, there are four cases registered against him in Jodhpur by the police and forest department.
In the first case he was convicted for killing an antelope on September 28 ,1998.
In the second case, Khan allegedly killed two antelopes, called black bucks, on September 29 for which he was given one year's imprisonment and fined Rs5,000 (Dh417) on February 17 this year.
The third case involves poaching of black bucks on October 1, 1998. The co-accused, also Bollywood stars, Sonali Bendre, Saif Ali Khan, Neelam and Tabu who were part of his hunting group.
The fourth case is under the Arms Act for a gun without licence.

Source:here


No wonder you're a dubai based lawyer.

How appropriate, GN shoved you up the ass, just a few pages apart. Now I'm wondering whether that was unintentional or deliberate. I'm siding with the latter.

A March to Remember

I'm not into the habit of watching documentaries, and if I do, I'm mostly hooked to the ones on safety/disaster/technology. I'd given up on animal documentaries quite a while back. I vividly remember watching the mircat and his unending search for something to survive on. His stomach's been empty for a week, time's running out. His eyes sweeps the desert, his stomach rumbling. And then they show him poking his head up, which means he's found something. My heart leaps with joy, finally he's not going to die on this documentary.

And then they show why his heart leapt with joy too, it was a female mircat. Instinct takes over and my sympathy churns into disgust in no time. To add insult to injury, the copulation is shown in detail. Never again I said, never will I venture into documentaries of the animal kingdom. Well, I'm puzzled at my own narrow mindedness at times.

Until I downloaded March of the Penguins.



It's an account of the perilous life of the Emperor Penguin. Larome and Jarome, are the two brothers who film the ritual which the penguins have undertaken since time immemorial. The ritual is the essence of the documentary, it's their fight against nature for their own future. We come to know that both father and mother almost end up killing themselves for the sake of their offspring. It begins in september, when it's summer, when they magically march around seventy miles inland for breeding. The march is spectacular in itself, all of them march in one line, kind of like a school parade. It takes a good two months until an egg is laid, and then it's time for nature to play the devil. It's also when the couple separate, the mother takes a trip back to the sea for feeding herself. The sun sets permanently for the harsh winter to set in. Icy cold winds in excess of 150 mph threatens the very survival of the egg, placed in between the fathers feet.

It goes on for four months. Meanwhile, the male penguin loses fifty percent of his weight. By this time many males as well as their eggs have succumbed to darwins theory. Finally the eggs hatch, the newborn are hungry and await their mothers who should return with a belly full of food. The harsh winter have also taken the lives of their mothers and the chicks prepare for yet another fight for survival. Eventually their mothers come and it's the turn of their fathers to fill their empty stomachs. Many perish on the trip back, it's been over 5 months with no food.

And then we come to the conclusion of this amazing documentary, they return for a final get together - a picture perfect mother, father and child, seldom seen anywhere in the animal kingdom. Almost immediately, it's time for them to part, they've fought the worst. The 'kids' look on into the horizon, as their apathetic parents leave them with a newfound sense of freedom. And so they get ready for the great march.

Their march for survival.

This ritual is one that has no chance of getting back on track, should there be a single problem. It's akin to an engine, a single mistake brings the machine to a halt. No wonder this documentary won an Oscar. The photography is absolutely breathtaking, never has the south pole looked so beautiful with a thousand penguins in the backdrop. The haunting background score, the brilliant narrative by Morgan Freeman... makes this one unforgettable documentary.

Unconditional love and sacrifice, it still exists in places you'd never believe it would.

A picture speaks a thousand words

One look at this picture and it tells you that the people described in the article are blatant liars. As seen clearly, there are 5 rows of mini bumps(each consisting of another 5 bumps) before the major speed hump. This seems to have made our junior Alonzos to curse and scream as they hit the brakes. What do you think those mini bumps are made for, you morons? And now you need a sign post?

Thank you GN for yet another news report filler.

Live Within Means? WTF?

A letter in GN goes...

Live within means
Something is off in the article "Spiralling rents force couples to live apart" (Gulf News, April 1). The Filipino couple couldn't afford to rent a flat on their own, but their combined salary is sufficient to share a flat with another family. An income of Dh5,300 per month and they could not pay Dh1,200-Dh2,000 as rent? Where is the rest of the money spent? Supposed financial hardships are often self-imposed.
Many Asian expatriates have massive local debts used to buy land, homes and businesses back home. Couples with lower wages find a way to stay together and live within their means.
From A Reader
Dubai
Name withheld by request


Yet another anonymous bum who doesn't understand the gravity of the situation.

Point #1. Just because you don't have a massive debt and are prudent enough not to have one, doesn't mean the rest of the expats are.
Point #2. When a majority of expats are finding it hard to find affordable accomodation, you are talking of 'living within means'? Isn't the problem 'Impossible to even live within means'?

In a nutshell, all of you anonymous gutless mice ---
|| Whenever you read an article, please bear in mind that a newspaper report is a generalized account of the subject matter.||

Prices of almost everything in the UAE is on the rise and we have people writing in such letters. A cup of tea and a can of cola are the only things still available at the same prices.

Couples don't mean to come here and scrape on wafer thin salaries. Yes, they have committments back home, just like any normal human being would have. They were people who came here when the times were good, which was a distant 36 months back. Now they've invested time into a job and all of a sudden they're being juiced of all they have. The natural and logical option would be to leave. Ahh...if all of us were as smart as that the world would've been such a better place. I wouldn't even be here in the first place, would I? And so would you. So what the hell are you doing here anyway? You've -

1. Come here for a better salary because you wouldn't be paid that much in your own country (I'm guessing that wouldn't be an Asian country, judging by the way you've penned "Many Asian expatriates").
2. Your relative ignorance of this situation implies that you are well to do.
3. You just can't understand why people cannot live within their means.

I wish you could. Because you do get paid well in your country. Yet you come here to live a luxurious tax free life, in that cozy tree trunk of an island of yours.

Poisson d'Avril aka April Fool's Day

April Fools' Day: Origin and History

Also don't forget to check out The Top 100 April Fools Day Hoaxes of All Time

If anybody remembers, April fools struck india just a few days back...
'Devil Calls' Cause Exploding Phones
Status: Insane rumor
Panic has struck mobile phone users in India as word spreads of "devil calls" that cause your phone to explode: "People started turning off their handsets after a rumour swept Orissa state of phones exploding like bombs killing their owners when they answered the calls. The random "devil calls" supposedly started Sunday from phones with 11 to 14 digit numbers instead of the regular 10, said an official from India's state-owned Bharat Sanchar Nigam phone company."